Jemma. We now understand that this is just a phase and will follow through on your suggestions, Well i am very upset these days my problem is when i use to come back from home my baby didnt comes to me he goes to everyones hand except me i use to cry at night daily of this reason i have fear that he will forget me forever and the attachment will not develop between me and with my baby in 24 hrs he use to come in my hand for only 1 hr.Will my baby forgets me forever or will not i use to wait daily for him at office to meet him as soon as possible but he doesnt gives any reaction to me when i come to home,i am very tensed please give solid solution as he is closed to his grandma and with my brother-in-law. My baby boy is 6 moths and I know he prefers dad. Try "introducing the mouth to the bottle" rather than trying to get the baby to drink. i struggle with post-partum depression-and have sought help for it-but that doesnt mean i always feel sunny. Pennsylvania mom Rebecca Shumard gave birth to daughter Eden at 27 weeks. Try to have a lot of skin contact with her. I used to adore my parents to death. i am a younger mother who still lives with my mother. Paula is right. I know shes only 6 months but shes not loving at all towards me..If i try to hug her and cuddle she pushes and screams and kicks, she would rather go to anyone but me.i treat her like an angel and I dont understand why she doesnt seem to love me.. Shes a really happy smiley baby. And I really felt that it started to work almost immediately. Parenthood is a great opportunity for personal development! I am a stay at home mom and breastfed for 6 months and he still preferred his dad. So they want to carried around the clock, wont play by themselves, cant be handed over to anyone else but mom or possibly dad without screaming like there was no tomorrow. house jobs near tampines; lego art beatles soundtrack; between the lions cliffhanger; professional football academy near mysuru, karnataka; You can also search for adoption support groups and workshops where you live, to connect with other parents in your situation. There is simply no replacement for a mother, period. I feel like Im only good for her when she needs a diaper changed. A scary thought! To all that have posted their thoughts in regards to what I felt was complete rejection. Ive been home with her from the beginning. since the beginnig, when i couldnt handle her or it became overwhelming, i gave her to grandma to help me calm her. So, maybe this isnt something thats recognized by a small child, but its eventually recognized, in my opinion. Who would have thought that a tiny little mite like her could devestate me. Just recently he has started clinging to Daddy again, and I noticed that it was coinciding with feeling quite homesick (I live abroad, far away from my parents and siblings). He tells me he wants me to leave and daddy to stay. I give him 100000 kisses daily and hugs to kind of make up for it. I want to know if there are commonalities that us moms share. I work full time and my one-year-old goes to daycare 3 days per week and stays at home with her dad 2 days per week. my daughter is now one year old and our bond has strengthened. Please help what could it be if ive been such a great mommy to him super lovable!! So you are probably doing a fabulous job with making her feel safe with you and also maybe she hasnt yet started to suffer from separation anxiety. My son is 9 months old and , Ive always taken care of him feed, everything he needs Ive been by his side since we left the hospital, now that I moved to another state he doesnt call me momma anymore he calls it to his grandma he just doesnt seem to need me anymore . Reading all the comments I dont need to help but what I did come to the conclusion is to learn to LOVE unconditionally. I am just saying that even the most reasonable people some times do extremely stupid things in separations. Such a silly situation. You may be feeling a range of emotions about being away from your baby, all while getting used to a new daily routine that might involve busier mornings, daycare drop . There will be days and periods when all he does is yell at you. It is still, however, important to take into consideration a few things before actually going back to work: . There is a worker at her nursery who she is not keen on and she scratched her yesterday which puts me in the same category as her I guess. My partner is the light of his life. Around 12 weeks or so, speak with your boss about the details of your maternity leave. Recently, ive had the exact same problem with my 16 month old baby, after i took 3 months off work and back to work a month ago. That is an excellent way to allow the two of you to bond. Both my husband and I made it a consistent schedule just for her.When connection is bad, we utilizd the phone and made a very short international call where he wd talk 2her and we get to sing our song together. in return they are telling me dun seperate them from my child wat can i do . What she calls you means nothing. Thank you for letting us know that things got better, it has made all the difference to me. Choosing which wars to fight as a parent makes a big difference. Things will get better. I play with, love and nurture my 17 month old boy but he doesnt seem to care about me. Please help me!! Im at the end of the road and i dont know what to do. You ask about the girl not wanting to talk to mom on the phone. there babys there used to those that give them there needs and time and attention Im going on my 3rd baby and what i find affective is how the care provider response when you get there Im always excited and hug and kiss daddy when he is home and thats how my children respond they love daddy but when they want or need something its always mommy and believe me some time i want it to be daddy, MY YEAR OLD DAUGHTER PREFERS ANYONE BUT ME, EVEN THO I BREAST FEED, AND DO EVERYTHING FOR HER IN GENERAL, I TRY NO TO SPOIL HER BECAUSE SHE IS THE ONLY DAUGHTER, GRAND DAUGHTER, NICE AND SO ON I NEVER HAD A POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION SO IT CANT BE THATIM LAID OFF SO IM WITH HER 24/7 NO ONE HAS EVER BABY SET HER I DONT HAVE MY PARENTS NEAR OR ANY FAMILY, BUT MY HUSBAND FAMILY COME OVER AROUND TWICE A WEEK I ALWAYS WANTED HER TO BE OPEN WITH PEOPLE AND NOT TO BE SHY SO I THAGTH HER TO LOVE EVERY ONE ESPECIALLY HER GRANDMOTHER BUT NOW I THINK I DID MISTAKE WITH THAT BECAUSE IT SEEMS THAT SHE DOESNT LOVE ME ANY MORE :( IS DEPRESSING ME NOW PLEASE HELP ME..IAM OPEN TO ANY ADVICES THANK YOU. Near the end of your pregnancy, talk to your HR department or supervisor about your return to work plan. you are a good mother. From the day he was born (and Im his birth mother for heavens sake!) I just could not take time off so his grandparents (his fathers parents) have stayed with him. Mom is getting really depressed with this and is the reason for many of the heated arguments between us. She cries hysterically when she hears her mothers voice on the phone and starts saying No No No. saying that she isnt good the way she is today. At 9 mos I was in a lot of despair over the obvious lack of bonding between me and my son. Im very hurt and try not let it get to me but its hard. Then I have my daughter four years later, and she is the same way, and she was born vaginally, immediately placed skin to skin, and I never worked or was separated from her. And do things together all of you. i so wanted to be a mom and was so happy to have her that i never thought i would be such a failure. Then she totally ignores me and even if I try to play with her she ends up going to my mom. Im ready to walk but want to be there for my children & my girlfriend is due again in December with another little boy. Here is the good news: you are not alone. He pushes me away tells me not to tell him I love him. She just says well what can i do/say. She preferred me up until recently. I breastfeed her and I handle 98% of all care for her. yes its also my in-laws first grand child but at times i feel there are selffish. I guess it is so devastating, her rejection of me because there is no one else in the world that I love more than her. Hi, mummys! Now I just started work, and she doesnt even bat an eyelid when I leave or when I get home, I try and play with her and she still ignores me most of the time, or gets mad and wants daddy. You sound beyond sad, really despairing. You are great mother, try to relax and just love your little independent son. He may be more accepting of it if he is not crazy hungry. Now a days she refuses my breast feeding. My husbands dad invited us to go to Branson and get away before my Husband starts the engineering program at K-State. But he just doesnt seem to need me. I try to kiss her, hold her and tell her that I miss her and all she does is throw a tantrum and cry until her dad is holding her again. I was always there for him. I have an 8-month-old little girl and she does the same thing to me! I try to be a good mum, I stay at home and try to take her out every day to do new things, I play with her and sing her songs. Feed your milk to your baby. To all those beautiful mummies and daddies who have shared their heart with us, you are so not alone, I have had pnd anxiety since my little man was about 2 months old and I used to feel this way so much that it broke my spirit and heart. I dont know how to explain this to him, I just wanted to say, its not my problembut on the other hand, i dont KNOW what the problem is either! I always thought it was because I am a working mum but it seems that even stay home mums have this problem. Personally, I think reading books about child development and how to help your child in life can be very rewarding both to help one as a parent with becoming more confident and also to find ways to be able to discuss how to raise a child without it becoming angry or sensitive. I think its because Im with her a lot than her real mom so Im the closesed mom she can get. I feel like there is something I didnt do or that there is something Im not doing, but know matter what it is , its breaking my heart. I have to also remind myself daily that this was for the love of God that I had this child. have a 7 month old baby and have been going through the same thing ever since he was born. This time is so precious and so short. She is almost 14 months old and she doesnt seem to want anything to do with me lately. Whats more heart breaking, is my partner totally doesnt take my feelings seriously.& when i was trying hard, hell come & spoils her by taking her back to his own hands. Just continue to be there for her and show that you are still around even if things are not exactly like before. "Be gentle with yourself, moms! Actually, I wouldnt be surprised if your mother is right. (And no chords these evening until your baby is asleep! I know he is only 9 months but shouldnt 9 month old babies already recognise their mothers? But 3 weeks ago I got hospitalized. Hi sad dad, And when I get her home she ignores me. Your mom can also try to stir up some excitement around you coming home from school; looking out of the window with your daughter here comes Mommy! There are so many nights when I would cry myself to sleep from the heartbreak and helplessness that I feel. Just being honest with you. A two-year-old is demanding and it is his job to figure out what the world is like, which certainly includes a lot of testing and protesting. Peek-a-boo. Hi my daughter is 4months old.She only goes to her paternal grandmother.Whenever i try to take her on my lap she starts crying badly. Skype is also, of course, an option, but your babies may not respond to that with any great interest there and then. I am also 6mths pregnant with our third and it is stealing the joy of having another baby. Also get yourself a baby sling and carry her around as much as you can while running around. I am feeling so rejected and lonely. Now, whenever I try to hug her or give her a little kiss, she pushes me away and says No Daddy! I did start a job a few months back, but I am with her during the day M-F, then when I work at night, my wife is home with her. Babies can feel our tension. Hi all i am the farther to my 15 month old son & he is a loving child at home but as soon has we go to his Nana & granddads house he doesnt want to no me. Going by the earlier posts, my problem is likely due to my travel job. First of all, kudos to you who co-sleep with your daughter! He is adorable such an angel baby, doesnt cry unless hungry, sleeps all night from 3 months, ready with a smile. Your girls are now 8 months old. So here comes my last advice. I found the update posts from those parents who were in this situation and came out the other side especially helpful. I work Monday-Friday from 830 am to 515 pm , i want to move alone with her to see if she gets a little attached to me, but its hard.. And I suspect it isnt helping your wife either. Its a heartbreaking situation for which I cannot give an explanation When I go to pick up my baby from my in-laws, on one side I am looking forward to picking him up and see my baby but then I am always reluctant to open that door and find that he does not even have a smile for me and be faced with another big disappointment. And you know what? wont she not even a day look out for me. I am depressed. i am a working mom. I strongly recommend you to get it! Fertility benefits increase loyalty, productivity, and fulfillment. I say with us because me and her father are engaged and living together. Please help! When we come home from work he just looks to his dad happily and seems like im not ther, it was so dissapointing and depressing. It was more about me I think than him. The child speaks to everyone on the phone but once she hears its her mother she goes hysterical. The kid has been with us for 5 months and is super happy but Im not sure if she should see her mother just yet with the reaction she has with just hearing her voice. Is my life set for me, and I meant to be rejected by everyone. At this, understanding and accepting a no simply is beyond her. Try the sleep and switch. I have been her sole provider since then, her father and I are no longer together, though she sees him often, but she seems to recognize him and holds her hands out to him and is so happy when he comes. Have you ever considered that? My mom used to take care of her during the afternoon so I could study. I miss my baby terribly. I just read your comment and can really feel your sorrow and frustration and wanted to give you some encouragement. Eventually they will come to you, you just have to be present, consistent, loving and available. or something similar. I rush home to see her and she cries/moans when she sees me I hold my hands out to her and she clings to whoever she is with at the time. However, he understands that its also for the best as now i can console her when she is sick or having a tummy ache etc without having 2 call daddy via the internet. Over the 2 years I have been in a terrible custody battle and its still going on right now. my 13 month old is having the worth temper tandrums ever. He does, I know. I have returned to work since and he always cry when I carry him? Since attachment can be an issue for adopted children, your question and worries really show what an engaged new mother you are. because everytime she turns away from me or will not smile at me i feel like my heart just breaks tears often threaten to spill. But now my loving daugher has became a real little terror. After some time, if all adults involved really try to focus on what is best for the baby and put their personal feelings aside, things will eventually turn out well. After a mid year holiday I started a new term and now she seems to pretty much loathe me when I get home and quite frankly it is breaking my heart. During these 15 minutes, focus only on your son and on showing him interest and love. But my 14month old is obsessed with his dad and it totally kills me. And even being so young, she can sense your tension, which might make her slightly stressed, if that is how you feel. Ive been really upset about in the last few days, crying about it and even getting cross about it. Still, for those of us who are lucky enough to have companies that offer small amounts of paid maternity leave, it's still much shorter than most other countries and often ends far before mom and baby are ready. Sometimes I just want to give up and let her be. For many people, this factor carries the most weight in their decision. He loves her and often she is so mean that he gets his feelings hurt. I encourage you, because Ive been there, to seek help if youre struggling with depression. I am sure she wants the best for her daughter, i.e. But the emotional part of me feels devastated. blessings to you all. In most cases, mothers return to work as soon as their child is about 5-6 years old. I breastfed him, co-slept, whenever something would be wrong he would want to be pick up by me. I really hope this was at least a little bit of help. well, its not. We have tried EVERYTHING to get this baby to take a bottle. But in about a week things changed, and he was starting to want me again. I am a dad in the same boat. Just show you love them and never give up on them. Been that way for the past year now. Baby swim classes, where the parent is with the child in water (if the baby likes it, of course) is a wonderful way to have fun together, for example.). But when daddy comes home, she always seems to forget my existence. Running away like that is completely unacceptable. Also, its kind of like when you go on holiday and leave your cat, when you come home the cat can be pretty miffed with you for leaving them, it can take a while for them to come round. I try to fix this by not responding to the kid and shouting at her and show her that I am bad. Breast refusal tip #8: Try a different feeding position. I just know it can be the case no matter what you do. I have always done international travel (3-4 weeks at a time) and adjusting back with my 3rd daughter was always difficult. But I feel like Im not supposed to think that. Anyway, Im not writing to give a full update on my situation but instead I wish to respond to your posts. I cant quite remember if this started at around the same time but she no longer wants to be with me she will reach out for anyone else who is around, and this is really upsetting for me. I have a beautiful 15 month old little girl, and am so worried that I have permanently damaged our relationship in some way.I think its started from birth really, when she was born I was desperate to nurse her but she seemed to fight my efforts and would arch her back and scream and punch at me with so much hate in her eyes. Paula. Lessons to Learn From the Above Quote. I am sure you mean really well, but in a way you are saying that you need behave badly for her to appear as a good mom, i.e. Like many of you, I am a working mother who loves her baby girl more than anything in the world. fnaf security breach drawings sundrop. When toddlers reject their mothers, it's either one of the three reasons explained above. why does my 17 month old ignore me?? Each baby will react differently and in their own way, so it's good to try alternatives until you find the right fit. For quite some time now (actually since my daughter was about 3 months old) Ive had this very same concern that my daughter does not love me. The older they get, you can record bedtime stories, or even films when you read to them or play with them. If someone can take care of your older child now and then; have some fun together, just you and him. It's no secret that returning to work after the birth of your child can be overwhelming. At about 12 months she became very much a mammas girl and now when i leave her to go to work she is loving to my boyfriend when i am gone but when she can see me she seems to hate him. What can I do? I have tried to brush the way my son behaves off, and put it down to just being a phase, but it has gone on for so long now. no more crying out 2 daddy when she has a tummy ache.and she hasbecome so excited whn i come home frm work.My husband and I lives in a different continent due to the nature of my work, and he wd come to stay wt us 2-3 times a year at around 5 weeks to 2 months a time.So whn he left for Asia when our baby is 2 months old, we established a routine using the internet via webcam and video calls every single day. hi.. i am a mother of 6 month old twin boys. It may be because she may be spoiled to the phase of a daddys girl, or it may be you. Its all new to me and its hard to mother when youre only 22. I am not a horrible mother, in fact I am a stay at home mother. It is quite common to hear new moms worrying about that the love at first sight that they expected when meeting their child for the first time didnt happen. Since about 3 months old she prefers daddy over mommy but now it is to the point where she tells me I dont love you I love my daddy. She pushes me away and wants nothing to do with me. Anyways here is the question: The childs mother wants to see her but obviously we are afraid shell take off again. Help . Its putting a lot of strain on our relationship. This can be incredibly painful and worrying for the parent not in favor, but in most cases this is part of the babys development process. It is good to know you are not the only one it is a hard thing to talk to anyone about so great to have a place to come and be honest with your feelings ..thank you. And then I would try to get busy with something else and just basically not make a bigger deal than it already was for me. Starting earlier is sometimes suggested to prevent bottle refusal. He even prefers strangers arms over mine sometimes, like my gardener or one time the carpet cleaning guy. 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